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Related post: BODY {margin-right=20px; margin left = 20px} P {font-family: Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif; color:black; text-align=justify} H3{ {font-family: Tahoma, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif; color:navy; text-align=center} Quartet Quartet. Nick – Allegro ma non troppo. I could never have imagined that something bbs 14year that could tear your life apart could have started from something so trivial. It was such a small beginning, yet it was to shape us for years to come. Can you remember those hot, slow, sunny summer afternoons when you were younger, one of those afternoons when there is too little to do, and too much time to do it in? It was a day just like that. With nothing better to do, I leaned on my windowsill, gazing idly out of the study window across at the school playing fields; white flannelled cricket players dotting the grounds. There was also the occasional figure sex lol bbs to be seen walking from House to House, languidly, in the heat of the sun. Too hot an afternoon to hurry. Too hot an afternoon other than to stare aimlessly at the view. Life at school could be like that. Sometimes too much time, sometimes, too little. This was one of those times when the afternoon, like life, seemed to stretch out endlessly. An afternoon of heat and idleness. Another figure caught my eye below me as he walked out from the front door of the House. I could see only the top of his head. The hair dark, and slightly spiky. As he came out into the sunshine, a bright white shirt. It took me a minute or two to work out who it was. Ashley. A year below me. One of those poor sods working away for their GCSEs. But by now most of their exams were over. Some of the Fifths had already gone home for the summer, others were hanging about waiting for their last papers. That was all behind me – I had been there, done that last year. Thank God. But next year, the big one, the A levels – they were still to come. Well, that was twelve months away. Still time enough yet. Ashley stopped, turned. Someone else came from below and walked towards him. They stood for a minute or two, talking in the sunshine, then slowly walked together down the path into the trees. Going for a smoke? I didnít care. I wasnít one of the prefect types, eager to bust offending juniors. I heard footsteps coming down the wing to my room. Then, with a bang at the door, the peace of the afternoon was litle girls 12yo bbs shattered. I turned from the window. James pushed his way in and flopped down on the bed, looking up at me, as I stood leaning back against the wall. The entrance was typically James in style. "Being idle again?" he asked. It was a rhetorical question. James was perhaps the closest friend I had at school, yet he was unlike me in almost every possible way. He was tall, mature, athletic, bright without being academic. I am none of those – perhaps bright, certainly academic. I donít know how we had become friends, being such an unlikely combination, but starting at a new school together, in the same House, four years ago, probably had had a lot to do with it. A bonding experience, to use modern jargon. And when you were new in a school, your circle of possible friends was fairly circumscribed. More so still, with our House system. "Well? Youíre not being your usual athletic self this afternoon," I replied. "Dropped from the team," he said briefly. "Iím sorry." To someone such as James that was important. I had never been in any games team, so it wouldnít have meant much to me. But James, mature when he arrived, had been in the A team from the start, had sunk to the Bs in the Fifth Form, and now, apparently, was even out of that. His slower bbs erotic teens growing contemporaries had finally caught up with him. "Yeah, well, whatever." There was silence for a minute or two. I was comfortable with silence. Then James started on what was by now his favourite topic: girls, and which of the many myths surrounding them were true. It wasnít really a conversation, more of a monologue. I just had to mutter the right things at the right time. This was a topic that come to obsess many of my contemporaries. School was not a place where you became hot bbs teens acquainted with girls; instead, you learned too much about the less desirable habits of teenage boys. Six hundred of them, all cooped up in one small space. And more intimately, with the habits of the sixty boys in House, cooped up in an even smaller place. Not always a pleasant experience. James was not exactly what I would call a party animal, but I knew that in the holidays, secret bbs russian he went round to parties at various friendsí houses, and he seemed to have a wide acquaintanceship where he ls young bbs lived. Being at boarding school was odd: you became great friends with someone for weeks at a time, then when the holidays came you never ever saw them. James, for example, lived fifty miles from where young naked girl bbs I did. I had never got to know many people around home: being away at school for nine months of the year didnít help. We lived in a fairly remote spot, and I hadnít the same social ease as James. All of which meant I wasnít as experienced as he was with girls; indeed, it would be fair to say that I had had no experience with girls – or, rather, what experience I had came vicariously from his stories. So there was little I could contribute to the conversation – or monologue. James talked on, and I listened to him with half an ear. As I stared across the grounds, I noticed Ashley and his companion coming out from the trees, walking leisurely back to House. I looked at my watch. Twenty minutes. Certainly time for a cigarette. Then I recognised who he free bbs russia was with: Giles. Giles had a reputation in the House – an unspoken reputation, but the vibes were there, for all that. He was certainly good looking, indeed handsome: blue eyes, floppy blond hair, slim, all the rest of it – almost a walking cliché of the public schoolboy. In this cloistered environment, he was the target for a lot of subliminal lust. And in a curious way, he didnít go out of his way to dispel this image. He also had a natural charm and grace that in one way re-inforced the image; in other ways, helped dispel it. What bbs virgin pedo else had he and Ashley been up to in the trees, I wondered? Then I thought that I was perhaps reading too much into an innocent stroll into some concealing woods for the sake of their nicotine addiction. They were friends as James and I were; they were of the same year, the same House. Indeed, with most of the Fifths now away after their exams, he and Ashley were about the only ones of bbs lola illegal their year left in the House. So it wasnít really surprising that they spent time together. It was perhaps my dirty mind. For deep down I knew that Giles had the same effect on me that I guessed he had on others. Not that they would ever have talked about it or even hinted at it: to be called "queer" was one of the more ultimate insults available, almost the nuclear option, and no one was prepared to risk that. Yet, I could sense, in the back of my mind, that many friendships in this environment went deeper than they might have done, even if neither of the two friends either quite realised how deep. And without girls around, boys like Giles became something of a substitute. Not that he was effeminate, far from it; but his good looks conspired against him. Then Jamesí next question caught my attention again. "Done the History essay yet?" he asked, dragging me back to the mundane. Two thousand words on the reign of Henry VII. "Half of it. Iím saving the other half until prep tonight, since Iíve nothing else to do." "Lucky sod. Be thankful you havenít got Woods for Geography." Woodie was well known for all the work he set to his Sixth Forms. "Done the reading for the essay?" I nodded. "I havenít done that either. Iíd better go and start it." Below me, Ashley and Giles were just entering the building. "Itís fairly straightforward stuff," I told him, "but thereís quite a bit of it." "Right. Iíll go and wade my way through it. See you later." I next saw Ashley and Giles at supper. I was supposed to be in charge of their wing of studies in the House – an easy enough job, as they were all quite reasonable characters. There were no real trouble makers in their year. It meant doing duties such as keeping them quiet during prep, and keeping order in general. I knew that with another group of juniors I wouldnít have coped so easily. Indeed, in bbs c p land the unlikely event of my being asked to be a prefect next year, I would do the unthinkable and refuse. I didnít want to waste my time trying to impose my non-existent authority on a bunch of recalcitrants like the Removes. As part of the job, I was also in charge of one of the Fifth Form tables in the dining room. But now there were only the three of them left: Ashley, Giles, and Tom. It meant that there was often too much food as a consequence, which we didnít complain about, although the quality often left something to be desired. The consensus was, however, that Tomís four helpings of pudding at lunch were excessive. I finished the History essay easily enough during prep, but James was still struggling, and, not for the first time, asked for some help. The trick was to give him ideas that were good but werenít too close to my own – our History beak was expert at sniffing out collaboration in essays. It was late when I got back to my study. James wasnít the fastest of workers. In the gathering darkness I saw Ashley and Giles again coming from the woods. None of my business, I thought. If they want to make themselves nicotine addicts, that was their affair. I had already waged my war with tobacco. The freshness of the evening air brought some relief from the heat, but even so, I didnít sleep. Tired of staring into the darkness, I eventually got up and switched my desk lamp on, and read for another hour or two. Then, book finished, switching the light off, I felt the need for a pee. I opened my door quietly and glanced casually along the wing. A figure further down caught my attention in the darkness – my eyes hadnít yet adjusted from the brightness of the desk lamp. I couldnít see who it was. I stood and looked for some moments, waiting for my sight to adjust. Someone was standing right at the very end of the wing, by the window. He had his back to me. He seemed as if he was half turned towards the window and half turned towards the door of the end room. I knew that room belonged to Giles. It was late for someone still to be around. Barefooted, I padded down the wing to touzoku bbs sandra investigate. Getting closer, I realised it was Ashley. He wasnít moving – just standing there, motionless. I got closer still, and reached out to him, then drew my hand back. He was wearing only boxer shorts, and the upper part of his body was sharply delineated against the faint light of the window. I couldnít work out what he might be doing. "Ashley?" I whispered, barely audibly. He jerked round – "What?" – then saw me, and relaxed fractionally. "Oh. Nick. Itís you." "Whatís the matter?" He said nothing for some moments, then: "Nothing." He moved a pace away from Gilesí kids children bbs pics door. "Couldnít sleep?" I asked. He considered this for a moment then nodded. "Thatís right." "Neither could I." He nodded again and turned to make his way back to his room. The door was open and the room relatively bright; the curtains werenít drawn, and so close to midsummer the sky was model tops bbs still light. A half moon hung above the horizon. I paused in the doorway and looked in. His behaviour was certainly a little odd. "Are you bbs dee desi OK?" I asked. Everything was so quiet and still that I found myself whispering. He nodded. "Yeah." But he stood in the middle of the room, again not moving, head down. I came in slightly further into the room, and again would have touched him, but a gesture which would have been acceptable fully clothed suddenly took on a new dimension, seeing him standing there in only his shorts. Suddenly, I recognised from those indefinable gestures of body language that he was aroused: the heat seemed to radiate from his body, his lips were parted, his eyes unfocussed, his nipples now visible in the light from the window, hard. His arms were hanging loosely by his side, fingers half curled. I swallowed – I could feel my own body responding. I didnít know quite how to handle this one. He turned half toward me. I stood, fixed, waiting. "Itís OK," he eventually said. "Iíll be all right." "You donít seem all right," I ventured, cautiously. He moved slightly toward me. I had an overwhelming impulse, not to seize him, or molest him, but just to reach out and touch his arm. The heat radiating from him was even more powerful now. "Itís ..." he stopped. "Itís what?" Again he shook his head. "Nothing." And again he moved toward me, but now I could sense the moment had passed. "Iíll be OK," he said eventually. "Thanks anyway." I lingered, but then turned away. "Goodnight." "Night," he said, and I shut the door behind me. I leant against the closed door, the wood hard and cold against my back, making me shiver. I needed that contact: my own bodyís reaction was leaving me shaking – but not with cold. The attraction of Giles was easy to rationalise – he was pleasing almost in an aesthetic sense, as almost a work of human art – but Ashley, standing there in his room, had had a raw sexual appeal that I had never experienced before. Not like this. I knew I was a late developer, unlike James who had arrived at the school fully physically mature, bbs love but never before had my hormones assaulted me in this manner. It was a long time before I fell asleep, lying staring once more into the darkness, those images of Ashley flooding my mind. I felt like death at breakfast. Ashley, looking as if he had a hangover, kept his head down over his cereal bowl, nymphs bbs small boys not making eye contact. Giles tucked into his breakfast, fresh and innocent looking as usual. Innocent? Probably, despite the attentions he sometimes received, and which were not entirely repelled. Tom was apparently oblivious to any atmosphere; stolid, chunky, recovering from acne, and not the most aesthetically pleasing sight. His body hair attracted much attention, with expressions of revulsion and references to the other hominids from his contemporaries. James looked at me as we came out of Chapel and stopped. "Are you OK?" I felt a role reversal: I had asked the same question of Ashley last night. I gave the same reply. "Yeah. Fine." He looked at me again. "You donít look OK. More like death warmed up." I shrugged. "Maybe. Didnít sleep too well last night. Too hot. You know what itís like." "Ah." But much of that heat had come from the interior. The morningís lessons passed in something of a blur. I handed in the History essay. I felt detached from the world about me. Conversations went on around me, whilst I contributed not a word. But being quiet admin vombat bbs pics anyway, this didnít arouse much comment. Lunch was a torment again. Adolescent angst, I told myself. Itíll pass. That afternoon I stood at my study window yet again, looking out, and saw Ashley and Giles make their way once more across to the woods. The memories of last night came back hotter and sharper: the silhouette of Ashley against the light from his window. His body, with its shoulders broadening out. His legs now more muscled, not as boyish as it had been only a few months ago. His boxer shorts, now slightly too small for him, and what they had outlined. At lunch I had watched his hands, his wrists emerging from the cuffs of his white shirt, the brown of his skin contrasting against the brightness of the sleeve. I knew then that I was in love – or at least, in lust. Or perhaps at that time the word didnít cross my mind. Boys didnít love other boys. There was sex, free amateur bbs but in the mind of adolescents sex was divorced from love. Love was what happily married couples shared. Your mother and father might be in love, but the idea of them having sex seemed unimaginable. Sex was physical release, the urging of the body. And now my body was urgent. Those hormones had finally caught up with me, and I was in sunbbs ls stars a daze of heat, my lo pics bbs mind swimming with erotic images which were trying to become more and more solid. But I knew with a cold rationality at the back of my mind that the situations my over heated imagination was beginning to set up belonged to the world of fantasy. Ashley might be driven to Giles – indeed, I could, all too easily, imagine them now, writhing in bed together – but to Ashley, I was authority, the Wing Monitor, older, someone removed from friendship by position. I turned away from the window and the sight of the two of them, desperate for a diversion of some kind. I rummaged in my locker, and picked up my towel and swimming costume. I was no athlete, but the coolness of the water was always welcome, and I could swim up and down the pool in my own time, making my clumsy strokes. And the pool was deserted, the rest of the school outdoors at cricket, or just enjoying the sunshine. I could take my time, enjoying the buoyancy of the water. After ten lengths, my own personal standard, I stood up in the shallow end, relaxed by the exercise. Then came voices and noise. Half a dozen Removes came from the changing bbs cum post room, pushing each other around in horseplay. I knew most by sight, but no more. They saw me in the water, but ignored me, carrying on with their fooling around. Then, for me, the most appalling thing happened. I looked at them, at their bodies in their swimming costumes, and was aroused by them. Not now little asian bbs just Ashley, or even Giles, but the petit girl bbs adolescent body in general. Quickly, and in disgust with myself, I lowered myself into the water for its coolness to take effect. They were splashing around in the water now. As if they were not there, I swam slowly to the other end, and climbed out, not glancing or looking at them. Their noise followed me through to the changing room, which, thank God, was empty. I sat on the bench, dripping water, my head in my hands. I felt worse than I had before. I changed slowly, and walked back to House lightheaded in the sunlight. Back in my room, at least the exercise had had one beneficial effect, tiring me out, so much so that I lay down on my bed and went out like a light in a deep and dreamless sleep. It seemed like just a moment later when James burst into my room: "Are you OK?" he asked yet again that day. I sat up, groggy from the sleep. "Sure, why? I was just dozing." "Youíve missed supper." "God." I looked at my watch. Twenty past seven. "It must have been the sleep I missed last night catching up with me." Jack looked relieved. "Iíve been worried about you today." "Whyís that?" Momentarily he looked embarrassed. Then: "Youíve been acting odd all day. Then missing supper like that. I thought something might be wrong." I stood up. "Thanks. Nothing wrong really. Put it down to adolescence. Growing up and all that." He smiled slightly. "You always were a little behind the rest of us." "Hmm. And now Iím catching up. Is it worth it when you get there?" Now he looked puzzled. "What do you mean?" "Being grown up, I mean. Is it worth it?" He was out of his depth now. "What do you mean? Weíre not exactly grown up yet." "Never mind." The prep bell went, which dug me out of the hole I was getting into. "Better go," said James. He was Wing Monitor for the Removes, an unenviable task given that lot. But he had the natural authority to cope with them. I realised lol bbs tgp then that he would probably be Head of House next year. I gave him a smile. "Sure. Iíll be OK - see you later." He lingered a moment, then left. Duty called, and James was a great one for duty. I sat down at my desk, and shuffled the pieces of paper scattered there. I had work to do, but was in no mood to even start on it. Instead, I gazed across the fields without seeing anything. By the end of prep I had done no work at all, my latest essay unwritten. Crashing out like that in the afternoon meant, of course, that I couldnít sleep that night. I lay on my bed once more staring into the darkness. Then, impelled by memories of the night before, I got up and walked out into the corridor, down along the wing to the window at the far end. Gilesí room was just to my left. The moon illuminated the trees, the leaves unmoving. I stood young explicit models bbs there for a long time, sightless. Then there was a noise behind me. I swung round. Someone was behind me. "Whoís that," I whispered, spooked. The figure came slightly closer. "Ashley," it replied. I leaned back against the wall. The brick was cool against my back. "Are you OK?" he asked, standing a little way away, uncertainty in his voice. Role reversal yet again. I nodded. "Yes, Iím OK." "You were standing there for a long time." "Yeah, well." We both stood there, a few paces apart, staring at each other, neither of us moving, neither of us speaking, and time seemed meaningless. Then I sighed, and slowly, I began to pad back down the wing. Ashley fell in alongside. We stopped at the open door of his room. "Sure youíre OK?" he asked again, looking at me in the dark. "Not really." He touched my arm. This is where words fail. There are no words to describe the feeling he produced in me – or perhaps there are words, but they have been *****ened by over use. All I can say is that the effect was truly electric. I couldnít help the intake of breath, the quick shudder of my whole body. I shook; my knees weak. His fingers stayed there. Then they gripped my arm gently. I followed him into his room. He was standing very close now. Although I couldnít see him clearly, my mind drew every outline of his body. I could imagine his boxer shorts, and how he filled them. I closed my eyes. But the image was still there. Now I could feel elwebbs ls the heat of his body once again. He was even closer now – his breath brushed my cheek. Still I could not move, nor would I have wanted to. Now his body was touching mine. I could feel the skin of his shoulder against mine. Involuntarily I moved towards him, so we were pressed together. I stood, unable to move, holding my body as straight as I could. I was scared to go any further, yet I was scared of what I might miss. His groin against my leg. Hot again. He pressed himself against me, again, harder, then shuddered violently, gasping. "Oh ... " I could feel the sudden wetness through the thin cotton material. He leaned against me, the tension gone, his breath panting. He gasped for air. I held him for a few moments. Then he pulled away, his breathing harsh. "Sorry," he said, his voice ls model pedo bbs panicky. "I didnít little child nude bbs mean ... that ... to happen. Iím really sorry." I found I was holding his arms again. "Donít say sorry." "What?" confused. "You donít have to apologise." "But," his voice miserable now, "that was a horrible thing to have done." "Donít apologise. You couldnít help it." "I suppose." He hadnít pulled further away from me. I was still holding him. "It happens to all of us." "But ... like that ... itís embarrassing." His voice changed, less uptight. "And messy, too." "Yeah, well." He did pull away now. And then I realised he was pulling his shorts down, inspecting himself, wiping himself. He threw the boxers into the corner of the room. There was a sharp smell in the air. Now he was standing there, nude, only a pace or two away. Was this an invitation? Should I reach out again? I hesitated, unsure, scared again. Scared of what his reaction might be if I did. Then he turned away from me, and rummaged in his locker for fresh shorts. He wriggled into them and turned back. "Look," he said, slowly, awkwardly, "sorry about that. I didnít mean it to happen. It ... just did." "Itís OK. Donít worry. Forget it." "Yeah, well." He stood there, and now I realised he was waiting for me to go. I was an embarrassment to him, and the moment had gone. There was no bringing it back. I opened the door. "Good night." "Night." Not that I slept. Instead, my mind was filled with what had just happened. Should I have made a move toward him? Part of my mind regretted not having done so, another part was horrified by the idea. I tried writing in my mind the essay I should have written during prep, but without success. My thoughts came back to Ashley time and again. And how could I face him at breakfast the next day? The sky was light before I managed a restless sleep. And then at half past seven came the sound of Tom, going down the wing, knocking on the doors to wake people. His hammering was unmistakable. The next morningís lessons saw me on automatic pilot. I muttered answers to Jamesí questions. I sat through lessons unthinking. Macbeth interested me not. At the end, we were asked for our essays on the imagery of the witchesí scene, that which I had left undone. I had to raise my hand. "I havenít done it, sir." The eyebrows came down, then back up in enquiry. "Why not?" "I donít know, sir." Knight looked perplexed, uncertain. Was I being insolent? "Iím sorry, sir. Itís not ... " "Not what?" I took a deep breath and started again. "Iíll do it this afternoon, sir, and bring it to your study." "OK. At least youíve told me. Honesty is the best policy. My study, before five." "Yes, sir." At least the essay would occupy the afternoon. James was back into the cricket team now, and had to hurry off after lunch to nets. I sat down at my desk, ignoring the bbs galleries view, the sunshine, and anything else, immersing myself in Shakespeare. If nothing else, it served to take my mind off other things, and by five, I had finished the last sheet of foolscap. I took it down to Knightís study – he was our Housemaster, as well as teaching us English Lit – and knocked on the door. "My essay, sir." "Oh, right. Put it there with the others." He looked at me. "This is not like you. Youíre normally very punctual with your work." I stood, silent, with nothing to say. "The adolescent silences. Do you want to tell me about it, whatever it is?" How could I, even if I had wanted to? "Not really, sir." "Hmm. Is it private then?" I nodded. "Too private to talk about?" Another nod. "Not home?" I looked at him, meeting his eyes. "No, sir, not home. Just as you say – adolescence." "Well, it happens to all of us. I thought you had escaped." There are some things you cannot escape from. I shrugged, becoming the archetypal sullen teenager. "Ok then. Thanks for the essay. Donít let it happen again." I left him to go back to my room, passing Giles on the stairs, who gave me a quick smile as he went by. At least at home you could avoid people. Here, you were forced into close proximity with them. And did I really want to avoid Ashley? That night saw me at the end of the wing once again, standing by the open window, the night air cool against my skin. I stood there a long time before hearing a noise behind me, the noise I had been hoping for, the noise of a door opening. Ashley was standing in the entrance to his room, staring at me. I looked back. He took a couple of steps down the wing, and I found myself walking toward him. We stopped a few paces apart, looking at each other in the faint light. His hand came out to touch my arm once more, and I followed him into his room. Again we bbs nudes art russian stood there, very close, the only sound being the sound of our breathing. He came closer, and we touched, then steadily he pressed his body against mine, touching almost from head to toe, his breath warm against my ear. We were both shaking a little. I put my arms round him, my hands on his back, his skin warm. His hands gripped my shoulders. He pushed harder. His breath was faster, more ragged. Then he took his hands away, and I could feel him tugging at his shorts. Now he was against me again, and there was only the thin cotton of my own shorts between us. Not believing what I was doing, I put my arms round him, feeling the smooth skin of his back. I pulled him closer. Ashley, nude, holding me like this. And me holding him. The substance of my dreams – made flesh. "Oh, God. You donít know what you do to me," he gasped. His hands reached for my shorts, clumsily, and I pulled them off myself, as he pushed me down onto his bed. He was on top of me now, almost panting, his arms clutching my head. His erection felt enormous against my belly, hot and rigid. He started moving up and down, and I gripped him, moving in response. He cried out now. "Oh God." The motion of his body quickened, and I felt the hot wetness, and myself responding, an orgasm such as I had never experienced before. He collapsed onto me, gasping for air, his whole body limp across mine. And I lay there under him, my own muscles unable to respond after such relief. I donít know when it was that Ashley stirred again – we must both have fallen asleep. He muttered an apology. "You must be squashed flat." "No, itís OK." Not true. Parts of me ached ferociously at being pinned down, but I wasnít going to let him move unless I had to. I moved my arm up, and nearly put it on the back of his neck. Too intimate a gesture to make. That sounded stupid, with our two bodies pressed together as they were, but, as I knew, sex and love were two different things. And sex was what had impelled Ashley – me too, if I were honest. He might understand what we had just been doing, but not a loverís caress. But he stirred, then almost giggled. "Weíre probably stuck together now." I could feel his organ, limp now against my belly. We had certainly both come hard enough to cement us together for life. He rolled off me, and put his hand down to his belly, and I to mine. No longer sticky now, but I could feel the stiffness of our dried emissions. "That was immense," he said, with a touch of awe in his voice. "Yeah." His head turned towards me. "Were you waiting for cracked bbs porn sites me out there?" "Yes," I admitted. "I thought ... " He stopped. "What?" He changed tack. "Iím sorry about last night." "I told you – donít be. You couldnít help it." "But tonight – I wanted to do that. I needed to." "So did I." He was silent for some minutes, then sat up. "Itís four oíclock." And the early dawn light was beginning to come through the curtains. I knew when it was time to go. I sat up too, then started groping for my shorts. Ashley laughed softly. "I was ready to rip them off you." "You nearly did." Another silence, and I stood up, pulling on my shorts. "Iíd better go." "Yeah ... OK." When this time Tom came hammering his way down the wing, I woke almost instantly, awake, alert. The world seemed a brighter place. I didnít know it then, but I was falling in love. And that always makes the world seem brighter. I showered briskly, and made my way down to breakfast, happier than I had been for days. James was at the entrance to the dining room and saw me. "You look a good deal better this morning." "Thank you." "You looked like death yesterday." "Felt like death. Still, I feel a good deal better today." I didnít say why. He looked at me more closely. "Somethingís happened to you." I shrugged then smiled. "You think so?" "Well, youíre back on form again. Welcome back to the land of the living." Breakfast wasnít as bad as I had feared. My mood was too buoyant. Ashley tackled his cereal as usual, head down, not talking to anyone. I could sit there and afford the luxury of an occasional glance. But my state of mind must have communicated itself to the others. Giles looked at me. "Who rattled your cage this morning?" I looked at him and smiled. "Down, boy." Giles looked disconcerted. Tom glanced up and then stared at me, a long stare. Then: "You could almost swear heís in love." I would never have expected such an insight from him. I stopped chewing for a moment, and could feel my face going red. I was without words. Ashley took the opportunity to carry his cereal bowl away, and leave the table. Giles looked at me, quizzical. Attempting bravado, I looked back. "Donít worry, youíre safe - itís not you." He flushed slightly and looked down at his plate. I turned to Tom. "And you can mind your own business." I surprised even myself with the authority in my voice. Breakfast was silent after that. That evening, I lay in bed, wondering when and how to make the next move. How to plan a repeat performance without seeming too eager. But all my anticipation was in vain: I was so tired that I fell asleep whilst still thinking about it. I didnít sleep that long, though. I was wakened by the sound of the door opening. Still only half awake, I was trying to work out what was happening. I stirred, sat up. Then Ashley slid under the covers next to me. He had removed his boxer shorts first. Who says it isnít as good the second time round? Perhaps less urgent, but more relaxed. More comfortable with the feel of each otherís bodies, more comfortable with the touch of skin against skin. We had lost some of our inhibitions. And afterwards, Ashley lying on top of me, I stroked his back. He lay relaxed. "I couldnít wait for you," he murmured. "And I had fallen asleep. Iím glad you came." He lifted his head up, although I couldnít really see his face in the dark, staring down at me. "Iíll come again," he said, amusement in his voice at his own wit. "As often as you can." I could feel his body stirring against mine again. "This is so good," he murmured. "I wish it could little girl porn bbs go on for ever." "So do I. So do I." This time the sun was almost up by the time he slipped out of bed to return to his own room. In lessons, I could hardly keep awake. Lost sleep was trying to catch up with me. I could feel Jamesí sideways looks, but was too happy to care. I could crash out in my study in the afternoon, making up for the sleepless night. And looking forward to what might come later. That night Ashley visited me again, and our inhibitions faded further. By now I knew his body, by touch if not russian nudists bbs by sight, almost as well as he did. I knew what excited him, what would doujin gallery bbs make him ask for more. Not just sex now, but perhaps love as well. But, as the dawn came, he sat up and told me: "I canít come here tomorrow night. Iím sorry." "Whyís that?" "Iíve got my Greek exam the day after. Itís the last one. Iíll need the sleep." "Fair enough." "Iíd better go now." He put his hand on my chest. I thought he was preparing for one last time, but he took his hand away again, and reached down for his shorts. "Iíll miss you," I said. "Iíll miss you too. But Iíd better go. See you," he whispered, and padded through the door. I could live without Ashley for one night. Perhaps. But there would be other nights – wouldnít there? But survive I did – the next night I was able to sleep the sleep of the innocent. And at breakfast the next day I wished the three of them well in their last exam. It was during History in the afternoon that the thought struck me. If he had finished his exams, would Ashley now be going home for the summer? After all, there was nothing left officially for him to stay for. And when would he be going home? Today? He hadnít said anything at all about it. I had a sick feeling of apprehension. The thought of being without him – perhaps for the rest of term, perhaps for ever - made me hollow and sick. As soon as the funsteens bbs bell went, and we were dismissed, I picked up my books, ready to dash. James wanted to talk to me, though, something to do with the arrangements for prefects for next year. I answered him almost monosyllabically, not hearing what he was saying, tearing myself away, leaving him staring after me. I ran from classroom to House, bumping into people on the way, ignoring whatever was said to me. Up the stairs, along to our wing. Ashleyís door was open. I went in, still clutching my History books. He was sitting on his bed, his trunk open in front of him, putting in the last of his belongings, ready to go. His room was bare, the books off the shelves, the posters off the walls, the bed stripped. He looked up briefly. "Hi." I stood there looking at him. "Youíre packing?" A stupid question. He nodded. "Motherís coming for me at six." I sat down in his chair, disbelieving. He looked up at me again. His face, which I had hardly seen in the dark. His body, concealed by the white shirt. Neither of us said anything. He was staring at his trunk again, head down. I looked at the top of his head. What was there to say? How could we say it? There was no chance of arranging to meet in the holidays. That which had seemed natural enough in the dark of the Fifth Form wing, in the hothouse environment of the school, would seem shabby, or worse, in the daylight of the world outside. The arrangements we would have to make to be alone together ... boys didnít make dates with boys. Ashley was beginning to look more and more embarrassed. But I couldnít just leave things there. I couldnít just let him leave, not without a future of some sort to look forward to. He cleared his throat. "We could always ... " Then the door swung open, and Giles was standing there. "That Greek paper - it was a complete swine ... " He stopped what he was saying when he saw the two of us sitting wordless. Neither of us said anything in return. Then he sensed the atmosphere. He stood russian dark bbs pics looking at the two of us, each wrapped in thoughts of the other. "Hmm," he said finally, "my word, Tom was right. You are in love." He looked at each of us in turn. Was there a hint of jealousy, of envy, of malice, of spite, there? Ashley made an incoherent noise of protest. "Going home then, Ashley? Summer holidays?" he asked. Ashley nodded. "Being picked up at six." It was difficult to hear his voice. It was difficult to hear anything. "Oh. Right. Pity about that. Weíll miss you, wonít we, Nick?" Then he looked over at me with a gleam in his eye. He paused, then: "Iím staying on to the end of term." His meaning was obvious, the message clear but unspoken. Ashley looked lol nymph bbs portal over to me, a hint of anger in his eyes. It was my turn to look down, not knowing what to say to either of them in reply. There was nothing coherent I could say. It was too painful to stay any longer. "Iíll be in my room," I muttered, getting up. Neither of them moved, then Giles stood away from the door. I brushed past him, out into the corridor, leaving them together, as I walked down bbs teen tgp the wing, back to my study. Six oíclock came and went. No one came to my room. I saw a car below, but couldnít look. Couldnít bear to see whether it was Ashley driving away. Then seven oíclock, and time for supper. "Youíre looking like death again," said James, as I passed him. I couldnít stop, I couldnít reply, I couldnít say anything. And now, at our table, there was just Giles and myself. Well, three of us really: Giles, myself, and the knowledge we shared between us. He tried making conversation, but got no reply from me. Just as supper was ending, he said: "Well, donít forget Iím around – if you get forum bbs non nude lonely later." I would have sworn at him, but, as usual, he had timed things just right: the bell was rung for the end of the meal. He left, smiling. That night, in the dark, hating myself, I made my way along to Gilesí room. When I went in, he was asleep, his back to me. I slid off my shorts, and nudists bbs board slipped into his bed. "What?" He turned. Then: "I was expecting you." And under the bedclothes he too was naked. He rolled onto me and took my head in his hands. He kissed me. My first kiss from another boy. Ashley and I had never done that. I had been wrong – Giles was more experienced than I thought. More skilled at sex too. But as he brought me to climax, his hands sliding up and down me, slippery with the cream from his bedside locker, I yearned for the raw sexuality of Ashley, for the innocence of sex that he had possessed. Giles might be more expert in the ways of the body – but there was a hole in my heart that he would never fill. Ashley – Andante, pastorale. The drive home back from school was dreadful - I was so mixed up about things, and I couldnít sort them out in my mind. A lot of it is too embarrassing even to think about - particularly now Iím back home again. Half of me canít believe the things I did - we did - together. Or the things he did to me. Half of me wants to carry on doing them again and again. Half of me thinks it was all horrible, and never wants to do them ever again. Thatís too many halves, I know, but itís so confusing. Thereís another half too: shame at how I treated him, not even telling him Iíd be leaving early or anything. But now Iím home I canít apologise to him, or see him again, and we couldnít ... well, I tried not to think about that. For two minutes anyway. Then the memories would come back, and I would think about them for what seemed like for ever. Unless I rung him at school. And what would I say? I could say I was sorry, I suppose. But as to the rest of it ... I mean, I donít even know where he lives, or anything else about him. Apart from his hands and his arms and ... No! Stop. And during the holidays – suppose I had go miles to see him ... and what would we do when we did meet up? I mean, doing the sorts of things we did in daylight somewhere. Iíd be too embarrassed even to know where to start. And I canít believe what Giles had said to him. Unbelievable. He was ... offering ... himself to Nick. I know he does, with other boys – but like that. Right in front of me. It was horrible. And Giles was supposed to be a friend of mine. He must have known how we felt about each other. To do what he did was unforgivable. Perhaps I could write to him. But I wouldnít know what to say, or how to say it. Anyway, how do you talk about something like that on paper? When someone else might read it, as well? It was too dangerous apart from anything else. In the car driving back home I was too knotted up about it all to talk, and Mum asked me why I was so quiet. Tired, I said. Exams – they take a lot out of you. She seemed to accept that. "How did they go?" "Oh, you know. Canít tell really. Weíll find out in August." Being in bed with someone all night takes a lot out of elweb child bbs you as well. I know I should have said goodbye to him. He said he was going to be in his room all afternoon. But Giles came in and sat down, and started talking, and obviously wasnít going to go. He kept looking at me, and there was something in the way he was looking at me which I didnít like. I didnít want to talk to him, but I couldnít just throw him out. It took ages to get rid of him. I just wanted to be by myself, to try and think about how I felt. Then Mum came early than she said she would, and so I never had the time to go and see him. I should have said something to him, though, even if it was only goodbye. Well, I did it. Posted a letter to him, that is. Just a plain piece of paper with my phone number on. No name or anything, just a number written in the middle of the page. I hope heíll work out who itís from. Iím sure he will. Will he recognise the writing or not? Will he ring even if he does work out itís me? He called two days later. It was in the middle of the afternoon, and, thank God, Mum was out. I didnít think it would be him, so I just rattled off our number. "Ashley?" came his voice. "Nick. That you?" My pulse rate went up. "So it was your number on that letter. I didnít recognise the writing, but I didnít know who else it could be. I thought Iíd try it just to free old plumpers bbs see." "Yeah." There was a pause. "Look, Iím sorry about ... " He cut in: "Iíve told you before – donít apologise." "Oh. Yeah. Even so." "You donít have to." "If you say so." "I do." "Look, is there anyone listening your end?" "No – thereís just me in the house. You?" "Iím calling from a phone box in the village." "Right." I took the plunge and asked him: "Where do you live? Your home, I mean." He told me. "Thatís only about twelve miles from here." I suppose I couldnít keep the excitement from my voice. "Whereís that?" I told him. Another pause. Then he said cautiously, "Term ends next Saturday." "I know. Look ... do you want to come over here one day ... in the hols? I mean, if you want to, that is. You donít have to. Iíd understand if you didnít want to." "Sure. I really would like to." "Really?" "Really." "Give me a ring when you get home, and weíll fix a day." The pips went in the phone box. "Ashley ... " "Yes?" He started to say something, then changed his mind. "Iíll call you, OK? It would be good to see you again." "Yeah. Call me." "Better go." "OK." I put the phone down. I wasnít sure whether Iíd done the right thing or not. But it was too late to back out now. I couldnít do that to him a second time. He rang on Monday evening. And, of course, Mum answered. "Ashley?" she called upstairs. "Itís for you. A friend of yours from school." I ran down. "Thanks," I said, and I took the phone from her. I didnít know whether she would be still in earshot so, cautiously, said: "Yes?" "Nick here." "Right." I kept my voice flat. "Someone listening?" "Might be." I turned, but Mum had gone into the sitting room and closed the banned little boys bbs door. "No. Itís OK. We can talk." "You said something about meeting up?" "Youíd really like to?" "Yes." "Do you want to come round here?" "Can do." "Mumís up in London all day Thursday, and Dadís out at work." "So thereíd be just you there?" "Yes." "What time?" "Thereís a bus at ten ... " "I know – Iíve looked them up." "Right. Youíll catch that one?" "Yes." "It takes half an hour. When you get off ... " and I gave him details as to find the house. "OK then - Thursday. Just before eleven." "Thatís right." "See you on Thursday." "Thursday. Itíd be good to see you again." "Yeah." He hung up. I felt a bit shaky - and I could feel the receiver sweaty in my hand. I wiped it before I put it down. And then I had to invent a cover story for Mum. If I said I didnít get much sleep on the Wednesday night, donít get me wrong. I mean, it was one thing to have done what we did at school, in the bbs pics under study, at night, in the dark, and another to have him walk in at home and go upstairs and ... well. I mean, what do you say to each other? Itís not exactly as though we talked it through before we did ... well, what we did at school. And I was determined to save myself up for it, if thatís what we were going to do. So that meant I had a great big hard on which I didnít allow myself to touch. Not the way to get to sleep. Apprehension, thatís the word. This could all be a big mistake. Mum was catching an early train up to London, and she woke me before she went. I sat up in bed as she went through what there was for lunch, where she had written a contact number down, her train back, and all the rest of it. Then at last she went off. I heard the front door slam. I looked at my watch: russian child models bbs 7:30. When I woke up again, it was after ten. Hell! I dashed out into the shower – essential, I thought – then threw on jeans and a T shirt. A quick breakfast. Make the bed – tidily. 10:45. I stood at my window, watching the drive, waiting for him. He should have been here by now. Perhaps he wasnít going to come after all. It might be his way of getting me back. I would feel such a fool if he didnít turn up after all. And I wanted him to come. But a few minutes later I saw him, walking past, checking the names on the gates. Then he stopped, looked at ours, then up at the house. He looked different, somehow. Then I realised he too was in jeans and T shirt. lola cp hardcore bbs Iíd been used to seeing him in blazer, tie, school trousers. It made seem him younger and slighter. He seemed to hesitate, then opened the gate. I ran down the stairs and got to the kds top list bbs front door just when he did. I opened it: he was standing there with a tentative smile on his face. "Hi." "Hi," I replied. He stood there, uncertain. I held the door open wider. "Come on skirt bbs in." He walked past me, head down, then looked round the hallway, and back at me. He still looked slightly unsure of himself. "Your motherís out?" I nodded. "In London for the day. And Fatherís at work." "Oh." Then another slight smile. "Come on up." I closed the door, and he followed me upstairs. He stopped at the doorway and looked round the room. "I recognise some of the posters," he said. "Yeah, well, some of them, Iíve got two copies. One for school, and one for here." He nodded, still looking round the room, then back at me. He was as nervous as I was. That was some relief. I didnít say anything, and he took another step into the room. I moved towards him, and we looked at each other properly for the first time. It had been dark before. This sort of thing was easier in the dark – less embarrassing. I had closed the curtains a little way, but I didnít want to seem to be too blatant. I suppose we were about a foot apart now. I knew that I had a real hard on. I didnít want a repeat of that first time. small bbs tgp That had been truly awful. One of those things that when you think about it afterwards, you wished the ground would swallow you up. The next day, at breakfast, I had been pedo bbs tgp shit scared that he would say something, make fun of me in front of the others, tell them all about it. I could imagine what theyíd have said then. I just didnít know how he had taken it, whether heíd minded or not. I couldnít tell. Then the next night it had been OK. His hand went out slightly. I stepped forward, and stopped about an inch from him. His hand touched mine. Then I seized up the courage to pull him toward me. We pressed against each petite bbs other. His hands were clutching my back, and I could hear his breathing. It was easier than I had thought. And my mind had been running through all sorts of fantastic scenes last night. I hadnít tucked my T shirt in – deliberately. And I felt his hands go down and under, pushing my shirt up, and the feel of his hands on my back ... I pushed harder into him. "Careful," he whispered. "Why?" "I donít want you doing what you did the first night." "Bastard." I pulled away and looked at him. But he was smiling faintly. I smiled back. "You wonít let me forget that, will you?" "I canít forget it myself. I couldnít believe it. I nearly ... " "Nearly what?" He looked down. "When you took your pants off after, I nearly made a grab. But I was too scared." "I was scared about it afterwards too. I thought youíd ukraine bbs nn go round telling everyone what had happened." "Never." "Thatís why you were waiting for me on the next night." He nodded. "I hoped you would come back. And you did." "I know." "Are you glad you did?" "Howís this for an answer?" Slowly, carefully, I lifted his T shirt, still looking at him. His had been tucked in, but then he had had to come all the way from home in the bus, so perhaps he had an excuse. I had to tug it out of his trousers. He raised his arms but it sort of stuck half way. He wriggled out of it. I had seen him before without clothes – in the bathroom at school – but that wasnít the same. You werenít supposed to look at other people at times like that. And I hadnít been interested in him then. And when weíd been in bed together, it had been too tight teenies bbs xxx dark to see him properly. I looked at him. Although he was as tall as I was, he was thinner, narrower round the shoulders. His collar bones stuck out. His nipples were small and tight. "Well?" "Well what?" "Having a good look then?" I suppose I blushed. "Yeah, well. Never really seen you properly in daylight before. I mean, not like this." He reached out for my T shirt, and tugged it up. Now it was my turn to wriggle out. He threw it onto the bed on top of his own. Then he looked at me. It was embarrassing to have someone inspect you like that. I know his hands had been all over me, time and again, but this was different. More ... public, somehow. I pulled him back toward me. Our hands moved up and down each otherís backs. He made a noise, a bit like a sigh. "What is it?" "You donít know how many times Iíve imagined this." "Me too. Last night was a bit difficult." "Why?" "Well, I knew you were coming, and ;" I stopped, then said it ; "well, I had a massive hard on, and I was determined not to touch it." "I know. I was the same." He moved away slightly, and put his hands on my chest. I stiffened, determined not to move as he slid his hands down my belly. He had an evil look on his face. He stopped at the top of my jeans, and fumbled with the popper. I looked at him, our eyes fixed on each other. I held myself rigid, still determined not to flinch at his touch. His fingers found the zipper, and pulled it down. That did it. I grabbed his hands. For a moment he looked confused, uncertain. I took his hands away, then reached for his jeans. The expression on his face changed almost to amazement as I touched him. I unzipped him, then we both struggled out of our jeans. I had cheated – I was barefoot, whereas he had to struggle with his shoes. Our boxers didnít conceal much. I pulled him down onto the bed, and we wrapped ourselves round each other. Daylight didnít matter now: memories of those nights in bed took over. I think I only came to again when I was lying on top of him, exhausted. I knew I was hot and sweaty, and grateful I had had that shower. I rolled off him, and looked at my belly, wet and sticky. "My God, you must have been saving that up for a long time," he said. "What do you mean?" He ran his finger in a circle round the sticky patch. "How much of that is from me, and how much from you?" "I donít know." Then: "I like us being stuck together like that." He looked at me, slightly surprised. "Sorry," I said, "I know it sounds a bit yucky." But I did. "No," he answered, slowly: "I like being stuck to you too." I propped my head up on my arm, and looked down at him, then I reached over and ran my 12 yo boy bbs finger round his belly too. He hadnít any hair there – actually, he hadnít that much hair anywhere. Not like Tom. I held my finger up, and he held up his. We rubbed them together. "I was a bit worried about today," I said. "Whyís that?" "Well ;" I was a bit lost for words. "Itís not like being in our rooms back at school in the dark. And phoning up, and having to make arrangements, and so on. It wasnít the same somehow. And I was worried that it wouldnít work out." "You mean itís not as spontaneous?" "I suppose." He could always put things so much better than I could. "And you donít want to let daylight in on the magic." I was even more confused. "If you say so. All I mean is ; itís not the same as it was at school." "You donít regret asking me round?" "God, no. Not after this. I mean, what do you think?" "I thought, well, after you left like that last term ... well, I donít know what to think. I mean, you might have wanted to forget all about it." "I know, Iím sorry. I shouldnít have done that. It was cruel." "I was worried that youíd think – well, that Iíd taken advantage of you, or something. Being older, and more senior, and all that." "You mean ;" I groped for the words "; something like: older boy seduces young innocent?" "Something like that." "Well," putting my hand back onto his chest, "actually, I think I might have seduced you. Remember? Each of those nights it was me who started things. Innocent? Yes: youíre the only one Iíve done anything like this with." He turned his head to look at me. "Seriously? Am I the only one?" I nodded. "Thatís right. Honest. The only one." "But that night – the first time I saw you – you were outside Gilesí room." I think I blushed. In fact, I know I blushed. "I know. I was thinking about going in. Giles – well, I know boy forums bbs gay he does it with some of the other boys. He tried it with me once, but I stopped him." I looked at him, remembering that last afternoon, and a horrible thought occurred to me again, one that I had spent a lot of time wondering about. Could I ask him about it? "Nick?" "Yes?" "After I left, did you ;? I mean, well, with Giles?" This time he flushed, a deep russian sex bbs red. He tried to say something – I think he was going to say no – then he stopped, and changed his mind. "Yes," he said, very quietly. "Oh." I didnít know what to say, or what to think about that. He turned and looked at me again. "It was different with Giles. You know, that time with you at school – it was the first time with anyone for me too. I was an innocent too. Then you left, and Giles ; well, as you know, he gave me a pretty clear invitation." "Yeah. Thatís right. It was a really nasty thing for him to have done." I paused. "Was it ;?" "As good?" he finished. He thought about it, looking up at the ceiling. "Different. Giles – well, heís more ; experienced. But it wasnít like being with you. Not at all like being with you." I couldnít help asking. "In what way?" He looked back at me. "Giles is sexy enough – youíve only got to look at him. But with you, sex is different. When Iím with you, like this, itís better than anything I imagined sex would be like." "Nick ;" "Yes?" I didnít really know how to put this, but I tried. "Is what weíre doing, well, queer?" He sighed. "God knows." "I mean, do you go for girls as well?" He was quiet for a minute. Then: "You know James?" I nodded. "Heís good with girls, he can talk to them, get to know them. Iíve hardly spoken to any. And you donít get much practice at a place like ours. I donít know how to talk to them, what to say." "But do they turn you on? I mean, like I do?" "I donít know. Iíve seen plenty of naked boys in the last four years, but no naked girls. James has these porn mags, but they all seem unreal. He goes glassy eyed over them, but a lot of them look like freaks to me. I mean, the ones you see in the mags are hardly the sort of girls you meet round here." I didnít know what to say. "So," he said, turning to look at me, "whatís your score rate with girls?" I must have looked embarrassed. "None. I mean, as you say, I never really meet any. I havenít had much of a chance to try." "And the porn mags? Donít tell me the Fifths donít have any." "Some of them, yes. Theyíre sexy, in a way, I suppose. But not to ... to wank over like they do. I know Tom does – all the time." "So what do big cock bbs you wank over?" How do you answer a question like that?? "Well, at first nothing really. You know ;" I stopped. "Yes?" Talking about it was really difficult. "It was Giles really. When he tried it on with me. I dunno, I was scared or bee girls bbs something, and I told him to piss off. But later, I was thinking about it, and well ; I got hard. Thinking about him, and so on. And I found myself thinking about him that night when, well, you know." "Which is why I found you outside his room." He read me too well. "Yes ; I mean ; I knew that if I went in, that he wouldnít throw me out, if you see what I mean." He nodded. "I just wasnít sure whether I wanted to go in or not. I was scared. Then you came along. And things sort of went from there." "And do you regret that now?" I pretended to punch him. "Stupid. Why do you think I sent you my phone number like that?" "You were lusting after my body?" I looked down at him, lying naked beside me. Not the body beautiful of Giles. Narrow shouldered, and skinny. Yet I had run my hands up and down that body, felt it, stroked it. Done other things, too. "I thought not. You were just after more sex, werenít you?" He had embarrassed me once more. "Honestly, you donít japanese schoolgirls bbs know what you did to me, that night in my study. I mean, wanking is one thing, but when I came like that, even that first time ; nothing like that had ever happened to me before. I never knew that it could be as incredible as that. And you were so good. You seemed to know exactly what to do; what really turned me on. It was amazing." "Thatís because you do have a very sexy body. It does turn me on. What turns me on is you being turned on, if you see what I mean." "I think so." I lay back, looking at the ceiling, thinking. God, this was so complicated. "Deep thoughts," he said. "Yeah, well." "OK, you can stop thinking for now," he said. His hands were stroking me again. His fingers moved up and down my hard on. He stopped for a moment and rummaged for something in the pocket of his jeans, lying by the side of the bed. He was smearing cream over me, squeezing gently. I put my hands above my head, and could feel my whole body arch upwards, every muscle becoming rigid. This was something else. This wasnít like being wanked – this was something out of this world. And it went on and on and ; I could hear myself whimpering. Then "God ; Nick ; Nick ; please ;" I splattered everywhere, and he didnít stop, and still I came, until I had to yank his hand away. I was gasping for breath, I could hardly see anything, I was helpless. He leaned over and lay on top of me, rubbing our bodies together, sticking us together once more. I managed to put an arm round his neck, pulling his head down next to mine. It was minutes before I could even move. My arm flopped to one side as he lifted his head to look at me. "Good?" he said softly. I couldnít even talk – I nodded wordlessly, and pulled his head back down to mine. I just wanted him there. I think we fell asleep. Anyway, when I looked at the clock again, it was nearly half past three. I didnít know whether Nick was awake or not. My other arm had gone numb. I tried to move – he had been lying on top of me for the last hour or two – and he stirred. He rolled off me, and we lay side by side. "Nick?" "Mmmm?" "Itís bbs berlin city tour half past three." "Oh." He sat up. I couldnít resist running my finger in a circle round his belly button. "Do you want a shower?" "Might be a good idea." He swung his legs off the bed, and sat, his elbows on his knees, his head in his hands. "Are you OK?" I asked him. "Yeah. Just ; wiped out." "I know what you mean." I stood up and went over to the window and stared out over the garden. I turned back to Nick. He was looking at me intently, staring at me. "What is it?" "Iím just trying to remember every detail of you." "Oh." I suddenly felt, well, shy. He stood up. "You said something about a shower." "Yeah. Through here. You go first." I watched him. Funny. I had seen lots of boys showering at school, but I had never watched one before, not like this. This was the first time I had wanted to watch someone. He turned the water off and came out, rubbing his hair. "All yours." I enjoyed the feel of the hot water. I sluiced down, and turned round. Nick was waiting for me with a towel. I stood there dripping. He started rubbing my shoulders dry, then: "Lift your arms up." He rubbed the towel under my arms and over my chest and stomach. He knelt down and towelled my legs. Then he stood up and reached between my legs, slowly rubbing me with the soft material. "You bastard," I said quietly. He looked at me, a slight smile on his face. I pushed his hands away. "If you start on that, weíll be here for a few more hours. Besides, my dick is sore enough already." He smiled again, and russian lol bbs hung the towel over the rail. "Fair enough." "Come on," I said, and feeling daring, took him by the hand back to my room. We pulled our clothes back on. I watched him lacing up his shoes. He stood up, and looked at me. We gazed at each other wordlessly. I reached for him and hugged him. "That was great. I mean that." He pulled back and looked at me with a slightly twisted smile. "Yeah." I look down and shuffled my feet, then: "Ne